This is an element of surviving and flourishing that has been significantly challenged in the last decade with the development of social media. There seems to be a continual connection into our homes, innumerable inputs, some supportive and pleasant and some entirely the opposite.
The invasion, due to it’s inherent addictive nature, is often uncurtailed. This must be compromising the ability to set boundaries and develop time and a sense of safety which allows us to recuperate from life. Unfortunately this may be especially the case for our younger generation who have not learned other methods of being.
Boundaries are about having the ability to say ‘no, that is not helpful to me at this time’. ‘I need to stop this and rest’ ‘I do not need to accept something inappropriate and destructive in my daily life’. This is a normal process in day to day real time, face to face encounters and interactions. Social media ramps up the frequency and intensity of the requirement for this processing.
Unfortunately the need to set boundaries have separation and time alone to resource our own selves has a conflict with a need to connect (see attachment blog). It requires practise, confidence and a sense of our own needs to fully develop abilities to enter and withdraw from situations., to know how boundaries are benefitting us and to know what authentic and supportive connection with others might look and feel like.
Due to the newness and fast paced development of social media channels it is often helpful to explore that apparent outer world and your inner reactions to it. Doing this on a real time basis with a trusted other can be an opportunity to learn in a slower paced environment. Check out what you need and experience, check out what you have internalised as normal. Checking out what is helpful maybe easier explored through talking out loud processes which are internalised by their nature.
If you would like to request a free half hour call to establish whether working with me could help support you in your discovery please sabcounselling@gmail.com
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